Identity Crisis...

Mick!



Dude, you really need to get your ass down here asap! It's insane how many things remind me of you and how i wanna be like.. Whoa... did that seriously just happen?! I know thats not hard for you to believe being that you've seen some seriously weird stuff go down ever since we were kids!Anyway, things are good here, same ol same ol you know. Never a dull moment!:)



Have you noticed how in India, every two min there is some insane festival going on. Yes, i said festival, im officially a FOB. It's weird how so many things i say or do are considered white, when on the other hand when i was in the states and said "thrice" people looked at me like i was from another planet..(read Asia)



Ok, back to where i was going with this, so everytime i leave home in the morning ready to take on my crazy trip to work i get stuck in traffic and insane dancing and noise at 7:30 am in the morning. Yes, for all the white people reading this, india is not exactly how you see it in Bollywood, and no, everytime we are happy or sad we dont break into dance with 20 perfectly choreographed dancers and remixed background music.

Those are Punjabi's and God knows i love them for it.



So, the other day i go to this place close to work to grab a bite with a couple of my colleagues. Yes i took more than 45 min for my lunch break, so sue me. Anyway, it was one of those days where you realize being sober at work really wasnt going to cut it, so i made sure we hit a place with awesome Sangria. If you have to do it, do it right, you know?



So i ran in, aviators et al, looking for some kickass service and atleast three drinks. I figured out what i wanted to eat in less than a minute, i mean who's thinking food?! The weirdly over enthusiastic waitress skipped over and asked us what we wanted. Without giving anyone else a chance to answer i screamed SANGRIA!!!! (to the tune of 1-2-3 TEQUILA!!!) and then she slapped me.



Well atleast it felt like that because she told me it was a dry day. What the hell is a DRY DAY?!?!?! $%$#^@$#%#$%



About ten mins later, the time it took me to recover, i asked her... WHY GOD WHY (yes, im ladylike, subtle and not at all appearing to be an alcoholic). She then proceeded to tell me that it was Tulsi Vivah and that no alcohol was being served around the country that day.



Now im thinking, how would you tell a white guy that he isnt getting no booze because of this festival? (In an american accent --> ) "Hello sir, there is this plant called TOOOOOLSEEEEEE and well its getting married today. So to celebrate this awesome wedding we're gonna NOT serve drinks at a WINE CAFE'. Oh yeah, what would you like to eat? Cheer up, we still offer ICE TEA!!!"



I tried convincing the evil newsgiver to spike my ice tea but she wasnt going for it. So i figured carbs cure all sorrows right? I ordered a large fettucine carbonera and decided to call it a day!





I love you!!!



Hugs!

Aweeky